how do you keep every other people from being hurt of your own actions?

you cant...

one way or another no matter how hard you try, you will always end up hurting someone, i know cuz im that position right now, huh...

its really hard taking care of everyone's feelings...but im not regretting any of it

im just tired is all, cuz at times the one's that end up getting hurt is us, i mean the people whose trying not to hurt others

....loL...

i made another poem, this time its a lot deeper and more me, and i'll write it on this blog soon enough, the poem has nothing to do with love or family

its about Friends

its just how i feel living my life and meeting the people that makes me feel me, and not fake...

well im out for now, Later~

im bummed

its hard to let "it" sink, even though you know its coming, i look happy..

its cuz i've been keeping myself busy, if it weren't for my work and such

i would definitely be thinking abt "it", and when i do, i'll go back to my being angry and demented and hopeless, crap!

to let go of something you hold dear, even if you just got to know that something, is to let go nearly apart of yourself, and this isnt a metafore or a hypethetic

tell me that you dont feel a lil sad when you leave a helpless street cat who has been rubbing his head around your leg, even if its dirty

its hard it really is, to let go, to stop loving, to stop caring, its hard...

and right now im feeling that, for those who can read between the obvious lines of this blog, yes you are right...but im trying to get through it...

and to the person who is reading, im fine, i just need to keep myself busy until i can get back on my feet, until then, as i said to you last time, i won't be happy for 2-3 days, but im fine, not happy but fine..k?

is this for real?

im in such a mess, my laptop is at a point of no return, i mean it can be fixed but i need a hefty amount of money to pay for the damages, and i dont even have enough in my account..

yesterday we received our 1st semester results, lets just say i achieved my target, but i think i could've done better, especially for my english, but im so glad that i didnt fail, i mean i finally proved that i can do it..

then i have this sudden feeling of being sad all the time, and this usually happens when:

1- im falling for someone
2- im having my mood swings
3- im just sad cuz of my laptop

well the 3rd one is actually not the usual case but i just felt like placing it there..

so, i'v thought abt all the 3 reasons

1- Falling for someone

I do like her, and i mean both of us have told the other how we both actually feel, but we both also agreed its too fast, so we decided to put it on hold, and i promised her i would wait, so is it logical for me to be sad? i mean she told me she likes me too, so why am i down?

2- Mood swings

this happens a lot back in high school, i mean i usually have these things usually once a month, and im not having PMS, its just that at times i feel so sad, it happens, but this time, what i feel right now, isnt the same feeling as im feeling back in the day, i mean its pretty much bigger and its a lot longer too

3- Laptop

the first time my laptop was broken was because of the Hard Disk and thats been fixed before, but now, its the screen i mean the laptop screen CRACKED! literally im not kidding, it cracked thats why i need a lot of money to repair it, i mean i know from a friend that it might cost a minimum of RM 700 to repair the screen, but my bank balance isnt even closed to that, and the worst part is, the allowance isnt even in yet...urgh!

so yeah after writing this blog i realised its because of the laptop, this is stupid i could've figured this out on my own, crap...

well thats it for now, later!